Sunday, March 07, 2004

Escape to victory

It wasn’t looking good; Emma raced to four wedges before Vicki had got from the middle to the outside rim of the board. Nobby had systematically accumulated his wedges with effortless efficiency and was two from victory. Emma got her fifth, even Vicki had bagged four in between hysterical fits of giggles.

It’d been a dirty fight; Nobby tricked Vicki into switching her correct answer of pens to razors in response to the product Bic sells 7 million of every day. Nobby was then denied a wedge when he jumped in with the answer “Thorpe Park, no, Legoland” to the theme park near Windsor. The war of attrition was on.

Ruffles’ game had been pedestrian. Having boasted that the Trivial Pursuit 20th Anniversary edition was easy with badly written and telegraphed questions I had been by-stander whilst the others’ battled for victory. With just three wedges and no rhythm I was resigned to battling for nothing but personal pride.

Emma hovered around to pick up her final wedge, even at one point proclaimed victory when it wasn’t hers. Vicki and Nobby needed two wedges. Ruffles, three wedges from victory, all of which were dotted around the board, stepped up to the plate…

Rolls the dice. What colour on the Irish flag represents the Protestants?


Rolls the dice. Which actress with a famous novel-winning sister has The Ruling Passion, her own book, ridiculed in a New York court?

Joan Collins

Rolls the dice. For the fourth wedge - Which great tennis player was killed by AIDS contracted from a blood transfusion?

Arthur Ashe

Rolls the dice. Roll Again. Rolls the dice, for the fifth wedge - Who controversially kissed Christina and Britney at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards?


Rolls the dice. Which writer with royal connections claimed royal jelly kept her in the pink?

Barbara Cartland

Ruffles rolls a two, Roll Again, a five, for the sixth wedge and victory…

Which Bugs Bunny character came to earth with his space dog, Commander K-9?

I buried my head in the Dobscrubs’ very comfortable sofa, I could picture the little alien dressed like a centurion with a preposterously big helmet. I could even picture the dog and the little flying saucer he came in. He was. From Mars. A Martian. A Martian. Called. Marvin…

MARVIN THE MARTIAN!! (I shouted whilst baby India slept upstairs)

Victory, from nowhere, six questions and three wedges on the bounce, an unprecedented march of glory. If I hadn’t been so tired, I’d have probably danced around the room.


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