Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Conduit to fiscal furnishment catastrophe

The one good thing about lunch times in London is the excessive number of lunch options available to the happy, hungry worker. My preference was always Benjy's, the cut price sandwich eaterie apparently run exclusively by Eastern Europeans. I was always pleased to see Berute serving at the shop near Victoria Station. I wasn't adverse to the odd Pret A Manger, but could never get the hang of your average London deli run by huge families of Turks. I couldn't decide my order in time and couldn't quite work out the process between getting your sandwich and paying for it, and if I'm honest, I was a little scared to ask. Instead I went for the easy to use Sandwich chains.

But I'm not in London anymore, I'm in High Wycombe which brings with its own problems, especially at lunch time. Wycombe's oppressive parking restrictions mean a quick jaunt into town is largely out of the question. There is a Shell garage across the road who do a neat Ploughmans sandwich, and our nearest pub has Exotic dancers every lunchtime. For true decadence, and free parking there is Tesco or Asda.

Yesterday I went with Asda, because it was near John Lewis and I had presents to buy. Before I went in I thought I'd check my balance at the cash machine. I popped my card in and plugged in 3-5-6-7, my pin number. Then the screen went blank and the lights dimmed. I had managed to time my query with a bloddy power cut, which is a bollocking stupid thing to do eight days before Christmas. The card (number 3545 9090 8933 0408 expiry 05/05) was stuck in the machine. I asked Mrs Asda what would happen when the power came back on, she said 'It'll probably just pop back out' which is the single thing I didn't want it to do. So I had to wait, and wait, and wait. Then the machine rebooted, and the card stayed in. I am now living on cash money only. I have bundles of £20's in my pockets, I feel like Del Boy Trotter.

Not to mention a little vulnerable.


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