National treasures
A week since my last confession…in my absence, I see two of our great national institutions have taken a kicking in the last week.
First Delia Smith is derided for her impromptu pitch-side tirade at Norwich City fans. Why is this news? Because she is a) mumsy b) middle class and c) a woman at a football match. Typically, a) gritty b) working class c) men who rant at football matches are considered passionate “football people” with infectious enthusiasm and drive. Deels, on the other hand, is just a silly woman who’d got a bit squiffy on a white wine spritzer. Poor love.
A few days later Katie Price, wisely dropping the Jordan brand for risk of it being sullied, was humiliated during her Eurovision attempt. Her skin slowly turning an odd shade of taupe, she waddled around the stage in a pink catsuit screeching some sub-Arabian pop catastrophe with a rubbish subtext along the lines of “I’m revealing the real me”. Yup, big norks and a lot of luck.
We should preserve these woman in formaldehyde and be done with it.
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